i give up on life.

this is ridiculous, and i can't stand it. i want to write so badly, and get these chapters up, but there is a lot clouding my mind right now that makes it near impossible to think of anything useful. i apologize for my frankness, but i need to take a break from James already and sort some life issues out.

yes, that's right, because i have a life.

i don't know if i'm abandoning James right now, because I really enjoy the story. i don't know if i'm abandoning Rocher either because that needs A LOT of work. like you have no idea.

i need a creative staff to sort out my problems for me!! ah.

ah, you have no idea the torment it causes me, not being able to write. it's like having a really long 24-hour virus that has you puking your guts until you're afraid they'll just come out. it's really that bad. i've used up my supply for a while, and i need to recharge. and it is physically hurting me.

i swear. this is no exaggeration. my relationships with my friends have dimminished significantly because of my terrible moods. it's ridiculous--like i'm on drugs or something.

so, i'm going to "rehab" in the literal sense of the word. i'm going to rehabilitate my messed up brain-chemicals, and bring myself back. if you want, you can come and meditate with me. misery loves ocmpany.